Molly: A cat story

Hey guys, time for the second post in my epic saga of demento pets! Today I'll tell you all about Molly.

THIS is Molly:

 Molly's main problems are--One: She's pretty fat,

Two: When you pet her too much, she turns to extreme violence.


 Now the first one isn't really a problem, I mean, who doesn't like little butterball kitties? But her mini-obesity has resulted in....affectionate nicknames that we constantly annoy her with(for a period of time, she forgot her name was Molly because we called her Cow, Molly Monster, or just plain Fat.), which often result in grievous wounds. She also gets extremely irate for some reason when we tease her about her udder-see the flabby, furry lump that hangs down off her belly near her back legs. While she'd lay sprawled on the kitchen table, we'd squeal at her adorableness and take turns daring each other to dash up and touch the udder without getting maimed, mauled, or mutilated by her evil claws and needle-like fangs(yes folks, she does bite!), until her green eyes would get that maniacal gleam of fresh blood or she would unleash a low, long warning hiss of wwwwsssssssssssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! After which we would depart with heartfelt and oh so true cries of, "OH, shoot!!"
And then poor Molly, miffed, would stalk off to find a new place to sleep, preferably the fridge on which she is untouchable, and also where the food dish is conveniently located.

Yes, the reason everything is in past tense is because we stopped being so mean to poor little Molly, so now she is much nicer...........


But if you ever overstimulate her, watch out.